Thursday, February 28, 2008

Verbal Abuse - Name Calling

Name calling is another form of verbal abuse. Name calling is the easiest type of verbal abuse to identify. Anytime your partner calls you a name, he or she is being verbally abusive.

This weekend I will examine the consequences of verbal abuse.

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Verbal Abuse - Ordering

Another form of verbal abuse is ordering.

When one person in a relationship orders or demands another person to do something, he or she is telling his or her partner he or she should be ready at any moment to meet his or her needs, desires, and wants. Furthermore, the abuser denies his partner the right to make his or her own choices.

Here are a few examples of ordering statements:

-Clean that up.
-Take the trash out, now!
-We are not going to discuss this any longer.
-Make dinner.
-You're not going out of the house looking like that!

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Feedback from my readers?

The series on verbal abuse will be ending soon, and I wanted to know what types of things my readers would like to see in this blog.

Would you like to see reviews of research? Are there any specific topics you would like me to discuss in the near future? Do you have specific questions?

I want to make this blog the most useful for all of my readers, so please feel free to leave any feedback and/or questions you have on any post and I will do my best to address all the things you'd like to know about.

You can also e-mail me your questions and comments at:


Monday, February 25, 2008

Eating Disorder Warning Signs and Information

In light of today's Dr. Phil show on eating disorders, I'm sure there will be some friends and relatives searching for information about eating disorders. I hope the information I provide here can help you help someone you love.

I wrote some posts about Anorexia and Bulimia last year, which I thought may be helpful for people looking for information about the disorders:
What is Anorexia Nervosa?

What is Bulimia Nervosa?

Some warning signs that your loved one may be suffering with an eating disorder include:
-Making excuses to avoid meals or eating, such as, "I already ate," "I'm not hungry," or, "I'm going to eat later with so-and-so."
-Measuring portion sizes or weighing food
-Cutting food into tiny pieces before eating it
-Using diet pills
-Skipping meals
-Wearing layers of clothes or wearing baggy clothes to cover weight loss
-Complaints of being cold all the time
-Weight fluctuations
-Rapid weight loss or gain
-Large amounts of food missing from cabinets or the fridge could be signs of binging behavior
-Noticing several wrappers and food containers in piles could also be a sign of binging
-Taking frequent trips to the restroom after meals could be a sign that your loved one is purging
-Complaints from your loved one about how he or she is fat, disgusting, and/or ugly
-An obsession with food, weight, food, and/or body image

If you believe someone you love is suffering from an eating disorder, please encourage him or her to seek professional help. If not treated properly early on, eating disorders can, and do, become fatal conditions.

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Dr. Phil Schedule Feb. 25-29, 2008

This week's Dr. Phil's shows are as follows:

Monday: Deadly Thin - Dr. Phil talks with a woman who is struggling with Anorexia and Bulimia. Aimee is only 60 pounds, but she still believes she's fat. Dr. Phil also talks with a former guest who has an inspiring story of recovery.

Tuesday: Alter Egos - Dr. Phil talks to guests who lead double lives.

Wednesday: Internet Cheats - Tameka wants her fiance to take down his MySpace profiles because he has already cheated on her twice with them. Her fiance says he needs the profiles to promote his business. Find out what happens when Dr. Phil asks the fiance to take a lie detector test.

Thursday: Still Choosing the Crown - The guests on this show are wives and mothers, but still want to compete in pageants. Dr. Phil has some words of advice for a woman who is pregnant with her seventh child and still competing in pageants.

Friday: Follow-ups - Dr. Phil brings back some of his most popular guests for follow-ups.

Friday, February 22, 2008

Verbal Abuse - Threatening

Threats are another form of verbal abuse.

Threats generally take on two forms:

If you (don't).....I'll....

For instance:
If you don't leave me alone, I'll leave.
If you don't have these chores by the time I get home, I'll be really angry.
If you keep arguing with me, I'll hit you.

The second type takes this form:
Do this or I'll....

For instance:
Do the dishes now or I'll make the dog sleep outside in the snow tonight.
Hang up the phone or I'll hurt you.
Do what I say or else.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Music Helps Recovering Stroke Patients

I posted this in my music news blog, and I thought it might also interest those of you who read this blog:

A new study shows that listening to music while recovering from a stroke can help patients recover their cognitive abilities and maintain better mood.

The study participants were 60 individuals who had recently suffered from a middle cerebral artery stroke in either the right or left side of the brain. Thirty patients listened to audio books or to their favorite music every day during recovery while the remaining 30 patients did not listen to music or audio books. All stroke patients also took part in a standard rehabilitation program.

The researchers discovered after three months 18% of stroke patients who listened to audio books showed a better verbal memory, 29% of patients who listened to neither audio books nor music showed improved verbal memory, and 60% of patients who listened to music showed improved verbal memory.

The researchers also discovered stroke patients who listened to their favorite music every day showed an increased ability to focus and maintained better moods than those who did not listen to music.

The researchers are not sure why music improved verbal memory and attention. Further studies should be focused on discovering the effect music has on the brain in recovering stroke patients.

This study was published in the journal Brain.

Monday, February 18, 2008

Dr. Phil Show Schedule Feb. 18-22, 2008

This week's Dr. Phil schedule is as follows. I plan to have a more substantial post either tomorrow or Tuesday!

Monday - Sober Up or Else - Two daughters try to get their mother, a long time alcoholic, to sober up once and for all. They say if she refuses to get clean, they will walk away from her forever.

Tuesday - Rules of Engagement Part 2 - Four engaged couples are living in the Dr. Phil house to work on their relationships. Dr. Phil continues to work with the couple through exercises and counsel.

Wednesday - Bully Husband - Dr. Phile talks with a woman who suffers mental abuse at the hands of her husband. She says she stays with him because she loves him and for the sake of her two children. Can Dr. Phil help this family?

Thursday - Family Court Battles - A mother and daughter are at war with one another and are battling it out with one another in court. Dr. Phil talks with this mother and daughter to try to find out the heart of the matter.

Friday - Hell Weddings - Dr. Phil talks to couples who had weddings go bad.

Monday, February 4, 2008

Verbal Abuse - Judging and Criticizing

Judgmental and critical statments are another form of verbal abuse.

A parter can make judmental and/or critical statments about you to you (as "you" statements) or statements about you to other people (as "he" or "she" statements). Both types of statements are abusive.

Some examples of critical and judmental "you" statements include:
-You can't take a joke.
-Your problem is...
-You have issues.
-You complain too much.

Some examples of "he" or "she" statements an abusive partner may make to others include:
-He doesn't know what he's talking about.
-He can't keep his facts straight.
-She doesn't know which way is up.

Dr. Phil Shows This Week - Relationships, Addiction, and Valentine's Day

I promise a more substantial entry is on its way! Thank you for continuing to check out this blog!

I found this week's Dr. Phil shows to be interesting and pertinent to the discussion of verbal abuse and relationships in this blog, as of late.

Here's this week's Dr. Phil show schedule:
Monday - Dirty Little Secrets - This show is about how secrets can affect marriages in deep, lasting ways.

Tuesday - The Dr. Phil House - Rules of Engagement - Dr. Phil works with four couples who are engaged and plan on getting married. Each couple has many issues they need to work out. Issues these couples have include verbal, emotional, and physical abuse, intimidation, and commitment.

Wednesday - Pill Popping Twins - This show is part 1 of a 2-part series. Dr. Phil talks with two twin sisters who have a pill-popping addiction. These sisters have managed to ruin many aspects of their lives.

Thursday - Pill Popping Twins Part 2 - Dr. Phil continues to talk to these sisters about how their addiction has affected their lives, encourages them to face their problem and seek help for it, and talks with the twins' parents about their involvement in the problem.

Friday - My Worst Valentine - Dr. Phil and Robin give tips to men on how to be romantic to their wives on Valentine's Day. Robin also works with two people who want makeovers for Valentine's Day. Robin also discusses how to treat yourself well on Valentine's Day if you will be spending it alone.

Please let me know if you like this kind of post, and I'll do more of them if you do!